Friday, August 26, 2011

Because EVERY BABY GIRL needs pretty things.

Saturday, August 27, marks the two year anniversary of the delivery of our baby girl, Molly Claire, who was born sleeping.
She. Was. So. Tiny.
The hospital had lots of things for full term babies, but not much for smaller babies. I made a burial dress for Molly, as well as a bracelet for her, and a matching one for me and for her big sister. I wear mine a couple times a month. I see my daughter wearing hers too, and it makes me smile, like we are all keeping her memory alive, and all connected, while the three of us have our bracelets on at the same time.



My sister-in-law's mom saw a picture of Molly's burial dress. She made a comment that has STUCK with me. She said,

"Because every baby girl needs pretty things."


I have thought about that comment so many times. When you have a baby that is not living, you realize all the things you will not get to do, and memories you will not make. You realize that you will not get to give her (if it's a girl) pretty things.


I came up with a little gift we are going to donate to the hospital where I delivered Molly, for the anniversary of her delivery. Our family is making bracelets. Not bracelets for full term babies, but bracelets patterned after Molly's, with tiny pearly beads, and a tiny heart shaped charm, just the size of hers... So that when a mom delivers a tiny sleeping baby girl, she can give her something pretty, and maybe take a picture of her tiny hand and bracelet, to remember forever. When you deliver a sleeping baby, all you have is hours, and then you are only left with memories.

I hope that every person who delivers a tiny sleeping baby feels like that baby is just as important as any other baby. People said some strange things to me after I delivered Molly like, "You will get over it." That was so offensive to me. How could I ever, "get over," delivering my daughter, whom I had felt kicking, and seen alive and well on the ultrasound? She is a part of me still, and always will be.



I found a song that PERFECTLY sums up the way I feel about it all.
These are the lyrics:

I WILL CARRY YOU

There were photographs I wanted to take,
Things I wanted to show you,
Sing sweet lullaby's,
Wipe your teary eyes,
Who could love you like this?

People say that I am brave but I'm not,
Truth is I'm barely hangin' on,
There's a greater story
Written long before me,
Because He loves you like this.

Chorus:

I will carry you,
While your heart beats here,
Long beyond the empty cradle,
Through the coming years,
I will carry you,
All my life,
I will praise the One,
Who's chosen me,
To carry you.

Bridge:

Such a short time,
Such a long road,
All this madness,
But I know,
That the silence,
Has brought me to His voice,
And He said,

"I've shown her photographs of time beginning,
Walked her through the parted sea,
Angel lullaby's,
No more teary eyes,
Who could love her like this?"

Chorus:

I will carry you,
While your heart beats here,
Long beyond the empty cradle,
Through the coming years,
I will carry you,
All your life,
I will praise the One,
Who's chosen me,
To carry you.

-Selah

You can listen to the song HERE.

A person's a person. No matter how small.
- Dr. Seuss



Have a Happy and Thoughtful Day!

Risa

20 comments:

Josh and Becca said...

You are just the sweetest thing. I LOVE your inspiring idea. Even in the midst of your own sorrows you still think of others. You are amazing. I love Molly even though I never met her; we share the same middle name. Spelled the same way too, I might add. In my family all my sisters, me, my mom and my grandmother share that same middle name. It's a special one. Good pick. Love you and your beautiful family.

Patti said...

Beautiful tribute! I couldn't read the ending with dry eyes. Love you, Risa!

Angie said...

So sweet. I love Molly, and I love you guys. I'm proud of you for doing something so thoughtful for others who will be going through similar trials XO

allie said...

Thanks for writing this, it is a beautiful post that brought tears to my eyes.

Kim said...

I love you Risa. I love your idea. I have always wanted to something like that to donate to the hospital. I am grateful to have you in my life. I just know our sweet babies are watching over us. Thinking of you and family today!

4lakedames said...

that is the sweetest thing ever!
xo H

Brad Kami and kids said...

You are an amazing example of kindness and love and we love sweet Molly.

Amy at Ameroonie Designs said...

What a beautiful donation. One that will make many a mother find just a bit of peace in a very difficult time.
xoxo,
Amy

Wendy said...

Such a sweet idea!

Michelene said...

I had a good time visiting with you yesterday and sometimes sharing memories together is just what a person needed. I look forward to many more times spent in your home. Many families will be blessed by your sweet and thoughtful gift.

Laura@Corner House said...

What a beautiful way to honor her. I am sure your gift will mean so much. I am crying.

Jolley's said...

What a beautiful post-- you are so inspiring. Thanks for sharing-- this will touch lives and hearts for a long time.

Build It,Sew It,Love It said...

What an amazing gift of comfort to those Mother who may be facing the same journey. Such an amazing tribute to your little princess! Thanks for sharing, and your great example of service!

Jenn @
builditloveitsewit.blogspot.com

LISA said...

August 27th is the 15th year anniversary of the passing of our week old son Joshua.I saw your post and listened to the song, and cried and cried. Even after 15 years the longing never goes away. The pain fades but the longing stays. Even though I know where he is i still miss the what should have beens. Shortly after Joshua Died we tried again and Lost our precious Ashley at 24 weeks she lived 1 hour was 8 inches long and weighed 10 oz. I am so thankful for the beautiful things we recieved from the local womens Club, who made gowns for premie babies. It was a blessing for me as I lived far from home. I know I was led to your sight that day.

Megs said...

Thank you for sharing that. It was beautiful. It made me get teary eyes. I love that you are making those beautiful bracelets for those sweet babies. You are such a great person.

Toni said...

That's amazing, you are amazing and I barely know you. I am almost afraid of how amazing I'd think you are if I knew you better! Let's try it out :) Your post was so sweet and inspiring, thanks for sharing.

Mark and Bethany said...

I love your idea of making bracelets for the hospital! I am sure those mother's will cherish them. I thought about that same Dr. Suess quote after my miscarriage. It is such a good one. :) Happy 2nd Birthday to Molly!

Lorrie said...

What a thoughtful way to honor your daughter Molly. Future moms who have such a difficult delivery and good bye to follow will appreciate that so much.

Anonymous said...

My darling little one would be 12... yes indeed every baby girl needs pretty things...
Thank you, even through these tears... and her Daddy and three brothers thank you too.

Jamie Gupton said...

This is so beautifully written. I shared your amazing story with all of my friends as many of them have experienced some sort of child loss over the years. The song you have chosen is so incredibly perfect! Emotion got the best of me throughout the entire song and I didn't dare turn it off. In fact, I turned it up! What a perfect tribute! One tiny gesture with one huge impact on others. May you and your family always be blessed!

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